A Romans 8:18 Thanksgiving: Giving Thanks in the Valley of the Shadow of Death

“I can’t believe Carl has cancer!” The man’s declaration about my husband’s terminal illness threw me for a second.

“Why can’t you believe that?” I had a feeling I knew where this was going.

“Well, because y’all are so involved with your church!” YEP, there it is….

I replied, “Jesus never promised us a trial-free life, only that He would be with us when we walk through the valley of the shadow of death. Just because we are Christians doesn’t mean we are immune to the sufferings of this world.”

I heard the words coming out of my mouth and I knew them to be absolute truth…but somewhere down deep in my heart, the sting of the word “cancer” released fear and dread throughout my entire body once more.

Sometimes we, yes, even Christians, have this misconception that nothing will ever go wrong in our lives if we follow Jesus…like becoming a follower will somehow immune you from the trials and tribulations of a sin-sick world, but it’s not the teachings of Jesus by any means.

Jesus said, “I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.” John 16:33.

He warned us may times that we would face all kinds of troubles…and He promised we could overcome them through Him.

But…tell that to my human heart.

You can read the Bible, you can know the verses, you can have mustard seed-sized faith, but sometimes, just sometimes, you break in the face of adversity.

And my husband’s cancer was breaking me.

It’s one thing for me to know the truth, and another thing to be strong in that truth especially when my heart was breaking day in and day out in fear and dread no matter the truth of the words that came out of my mouth.

My emotions were a see saw of up in faith and down in grief…over and over and over again. Sometimes my faith would soar into the clouds and other times I felt like I couldn’t walk this path through the valley of the shadow of death one more minute.

Then this verse…

Romans 8:18 “For I reckon that the sufferings of this present time are not worthy to be compared to the glory that is revealed to us.”

Wait, what? His glory in our suffering?

Weeks of emotional turmoil was coming to a head.

One month after the October diagnosis, while everyone was posting their “30-day, Thanksgiving Challenge” posts online, fear and dread welled up inside of me once more. This time I felt like I was going to die from the weight of it all. I didn’t know what to do, I didn’t know where to go…but to my knees.

There on the cold floor of my bedroom, I lost it. I mean lost it! I was bawling my eyes out and crying for God to take it all away. I begged and asked in Jesus’ name! I prayed and cried and pleaded until there was nothing left…and I mean nothing. No tears, no breath, nothing.

Flat on the floor in my bedroom, lower than I’d ever been in my entire life, nothing left inside…just empty. It was there in the quite I heard God’s voice speak in my heart…

 “Get up…”

Me, looking around, “What, get up?”

His voice much clearer now, “I said GET UP! You get up on your feet right now and you praise Me!”

All of a sudden Philippians 4:6-7 came to life for me:

“do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your hearts and your minds in Christ Jesus.”

I got to my feet and with arms lifted high, I began to what I now call, “Stomping it Out with God,” and a praise session began to form on my lips and in my heart….

“GOD, You are good all the time and all the time YOU ARE GOOD! Thank you for my husband, and thank you for the time we have had together! Thank you for all you have done in and through our lives! Thank you for creating us! You created every cell in our bodies and You can heal them, even terminal cancer if you so choose! And if you so choose to heal Carl on this side of Heaven, we will praise Your Holy name, but IF You choose to heal Carl on the other side of Heaven, we will praise Your Holy name still because You will supply all our needs and take care of us! I’ve seen You do it before, and You will do it again. You alone are worthy of all glory, honor, and praise!”

That was just the beginning of my Stomping it Out with God session.

I spent the rest of the time pacing that floor and declaring all the good and perfect things about God that I could, praising Him the best I knew how.

In those moments of prayer and praise, my heart began to shift into joy and peace!

I knew that no matter what we were going to face in this walk through the valley of the shadow of death with terminal cancer, that my Father was going to walk with us and He alone was going to give us that peace that surpasses all understanding.

This year we are celebrating our third Thanksgiving since diagnosis and my Romans 8:18 encounter with God on the floor of my bedroom. I’m not going to say that I don’t get fearful from time to time when I think about the valley we are walking, but I know Who is walking with us and I certainly know how to Stomp it Out with God now!

Everything that our suffering was going to bring could not even compare to the glory that He would reveal in and to us because HE would give us His peace in our praise.

We may have a Romans 8:18 kind of life, but oh man, the glory that God has revealed in our sufferings!!! And there’s nothing greater than the joy and peace only HE can give.

Praise His Holy Name forever!

Soli Deo Gloria!

Meet the Blogger – Read Laura Robinson’s Bio